The following post was not originally written by me, but I wholeheartedly endorse it as BIBLICAL (this post is very lightly edited):
I just found an interesting quote regarding marriage that shows the truth that if sex is not considered marriage, then this is actually an ENCOURAGEMENT for people to go around having “uncommitted sex” since it doesn’t bind them at all to that individual. It takes the commitment OUT of sex.
The TRUTH is that SEX IS COMMITMENT! Having sex with a person is saying “I DO” to that person! It is saying, “I AM COMMITTED TO YOU FOR LIFE”!! Then, and ONLY then, can we see the seriousness of having sex with someone else (which is called adultery) in which that COMMITMENT is shown to be a LIE. The person who has “casual sex” with someone and then has “casual sex” with another person has LIED.
Without this, what does sex really mean? People can say, “Oh, I’m having a sexual relationship with this person without really being committed, so in case it doesn’t work out, I can break up and get married again without committing adultery”!!!
So people who believe that remarriage after divorce while the original spouse is still living is adultery CAN GET AROUND THIS by having a “non-committed sexual relationship” (which they do not consider marriage), and then they can break up with this person (whom they do not consider to be their spouse), and they can MARRY ANOTHER PERSON while STILL holding to the belief that remarriage after divorce while the original spouse is still living is adultery!! See how that works? They can marry someone else AFTER they had a “non-committed sexual relationship” and STILL say that their current marriage is NOT adultery, since they didn’t count their PREVIOUS relationship as a marriage! A convenient way to excuse their current wickedness (adultery) by RENAMING their original relationship as a NON-MARRIAGE! I’m currently in a discussion with someone who AGREES that remarriage after divorce while the original spouse is alive is adultery, but DISAGREES that sex equals marriage. Thus, a couple can be in a “non-committed sexual relationship” for 20 years, then split up, and they can marry other people WITHOUT VIOLATING (in their own minds) the remarriage after divorce equals adultery law!
Yet the truth we should be telling our children is the seriousness of sex — that once you’ve had sex with one person, you have married that person, and if the two of you split up, YOU MUST NEVER HAVE SEX AGAIN WITH ANOTHER PERSON. The consequences of that first sex act LAST A LIFETIME. THAT’S how serious sex is.
And if sex does NOT equal marriage, then a person can have one or A HUNDRED “non-committed sexual relationships” and yet still be able to marry someone else without committing adultery. That’s really repugnant, you know that?
Anyway, below is the quote I found.
“In the church we teach the youth that sex before marriage is a sin, that they must be married before they can have sex. The world lives by the opposite by having sex before they are married. This is what the youth are taught. However, the bible teaches a completely different approach to human relationships; an aspect that is completely ignored. The bible actually teaches that sex is marriage. The act of the sexual union is in fact the actual marriage. The ceremony on the other hand is simply the public establishment of the titles of Husband and Wife from their betrothal. But the marriage is the sexual act itself. Now, we have been teaching a generation of youth a doctrine that has separated the act of sexual union from the institution of marriage. This is why some youth experiment with these things but do not ever even consider that the act they engage in is in fact the biblical definition of marriage. How different, do you suppose, would the youth react toward the subject of sexual purity if they understood that the sexual experience in any form would bind them to the person as an act of marriage? This is the biblical way of looking at sex, yet it is not what is taught in the church. This reinterpretation of sex and marriage, as it is understood today, has fed into the deception that has kept our youth in bondage to all kinds of gross sin. How can we expect our children to make wise decisions concerning their potential spouses when we teach them wrong concepts of what marriage actually is when God’s Word says differently (See Genesis 2:24, Deuteronomy 21:10-13, 25:5, 1 Corinthians 6:15-20)?”